Monday, May 17, 2010
feel like crying,
feel like shouting.
feel like saying things out,
feel like scolding ppl,
feel like hitting ppl,
do not like to be alone,
do not like to be left out,
do not like to be quiet,
do not like to be hurt,
do not like to be ignore,
do not like to be hate,
do not like to be suffering.
But it is all happening,
what a good month or life i had,
why i am suffering?
why i am being left out?
why i am alone?
why i am hurt?
why i am being ignore?
why i am being hate?
why i cannot cry?
why i cannot shout?
why i cannot scold?
why i cannot say things out?
why i cannot hit?
why i cannot feel the love?
why i cannot feel the joy?
why i cannot feel the laughter?
why i cannot feel the concern?
why i cannot feel the trust?
why i cannot feel the care?
why must i being forced?
why must i accept the things that i do not want?
why must i be the one?
why must i do things that i do not want?
Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?
Can anyone tell me why?
ignoring ppl is not a thing that i like,
showing ppl attitude is not the thing that i want,
giving ppl cold shoulders is not the thing that i love,
but why i am doing all these now?
why cant i just be the normal girl?
Why must i ended up so sad?
losing things one by one?
the guy that i truly love?
friends that i always hanging out with?
friends that i always talk to?
why must they force me to accept things that i do not really want to.
I am tired, really tired.
No matter how crazy i ACT,
No matter how cold i DID,
it not the one that i really want,
i just want things to be normal,
be back to the past.
why is it so hard?
I am tired le.
feel like shouting.
feel like saying things out,
feel like scolding ppl,
feel like hitting ppl,
do not like to be alone,
do not like to be left out,
do not like to be quiet,
do not like to be hurt,
do not like to be ignore,
do not like to be hate,
do not like to be suffering.
But it is all happening,
what a good month or life i had,
why i am suffering?
why i am being left out?
why i am alone?
why i am hurt?
why i am being ignore?
why i am being hate?
why i cannot cry?
why i cannot shout?
why i cannot scold?
why i cannot say things out?
why i cannot hit?
why i cannot feel the love?
why i cannot feel the joy?
why i cannot feel the laughter?
why i cannot feel the concern?
why i cannot feel the trust?
why i cannot feel the care?
why must i being forced?
why must i accept the things that i do not want?
why must i be the one?
why must i do things that i do not want?
Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?
Can anyone tell me why?
ignoring ppl is not a thing that i like,
showing ppl attitude is not the thing that i want,
giving ppl cold shoulders is not the thing that i love,
but why i am doing all these now?
why cant i just be the normal girl?
Why must i ended up so sad?
losing things one by one?
the guy that i truly love?
friends that i always hanging out with?
friends that i always talk to?
why must they force me to accept things that i do not really want to.
I am tired, really tired.
No matter how crazy i ACT,
No matter how cold i DID,
it not the one that i really want,
i just want things to be normal,
be back to the past.
why is it so hard?
I am tired le.
what we could have been, 10:10 PM.
Monday, May 10, 2010
am i paranoid?
I dunno.
these few days i really feel very hurt.
That one month thing is really a burden to me.
Half of the school year is going to an end.
Which mean i cannot see him after that le.
We maybe going to different class le.
I really dun wan.
I dunno.
these few days i really feel very hurt.
That one month thing is really a burden to me.
Half of the school year is going to an end.
Which mean i cannot see him after that le.
We maybe going to different class le.
I really dun wan.
what we could have been, 6:30 AM.
Tuesday, May 04, 2010
yesterday de you and today de you are really very different.
I just want to talk to you.
Whatever i said to you, it seem that it all offend you.
Other than that, i really do not know why you are treating me like that.
I just want to let things go on smoothly.
Although i may be waiting for your return.
But if you do not believe, i also cannot do anything to actually let you ch ange the mindset.
You say before that i make you believe the word forever for relationship.
So can i actually make the same changes to at least let you not believe that.
I really do not know.
You suddenly treat me very good and suddenly cold, really let me feel very sad.
I just want to talk to you.
That all i want, showing you care and concern.
Can you dun treat me so cold?
I dunno whether is there feeling for me by you.
But i just hope that things can actually be better instead of now.
I really very happy that i actually accompany you thru the time where you are doing csad.
But hey, i really dun know what i done wrong today?
You suddenly treat me so cold, that make me really do not know what i had done wrong.
Hey, i really do not wish that things will come out so weird.
I am just like syabrina, but our situation is different bahs.
Is like we are not a couple and wad, but at least we are once a couple?
I really appreciate that you wun treat me so cold anymore.
That all i want for now?
I am not hoping too much from you but i just want concern from you.
Can you fulfill my wish?
let me be the one to change your thinking?
Please?
I just want to talk to you.
Whatever i said to you, it seem that it all offend you.
Other than that, i really do not know why you are treating me like that.
I just want to let things go on smoothly.
Although i may be waiting for your return.
But if you do not believe, i also cannot do anything to actually let you ch ange the mindset.
You say before that i make you believe the word forever for relationship.
So can i actually make the same changes to at least let you not believe that.
I really do not know.
You suddenly treat me very good and suddenly cold, really let me feel very sad.
I just want to talk to you.
That all i want, showing you care and concern.
Can you dun treat me so cold?
I dunno whether is there feeling for me by you.
But i just hope that things can actually be better instead of now.
I really very happy that i actually accompany you thru the time where you are doing csad.
But hey, i really dun know what i done wrong today?
You suddenly treat me so cold, that make me really do not know what i had done wrong.
Hey, i really do not wish that things will come out so weird.
I am just like syabrina, but our situation is different bahs.
Is like we are not a couple and wad, but at least we are once a couple?
I really appreciate that you wun treat me so cold anymore.
That all i want for now?
I am not hoping too much from you but i just want concern from you.
Can you fulfill my wish?
let me be the one to change your thinking?
Please?
what we could have been, 10:26 PM.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
i really dunno wad can i do?
he is like ignoring me for a day.
no matter how much i tried to approach to him.
he just leave me there,
he simply just....
nvm, i think he just dun want to see me bahs.
i also dunno wad can i do?
is like it really hurt that he is treating me like that.
But wad can i do?
he is like ignoring me for a day.
no matter how much i tried to approach to him.
he just leave me there,
he simply just....
nvm, i think he just dun want to see me bahs.
i also dunno wad can i do?
is like it really hurt that he is treating me like that.
But wad can i do?
what we could have been, 12:06 AM.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
我想我应该放手了，
不然你我都不会快乐吧！
不管我怎么不舍得，
我也不可以自私。
因为现在我只能身为你的朋友，
看到你的笑，
让你感到开心，
我就以经很满足了。
我们的回亿将永远在我的心。
希望你也会。
不然你我都不会快乐吧！
不管我怎么不舍得，
我也不可以自私。
因为现在我只能身为你的朋友，
看到你的笑，
让你感到开心，
我就以经很满足了。
我们的回亿将永远在我的心。
希望你也会。
what we could have been, 10:19 PM.
Thursday, April 08, 2010
know wad?
i feel like i am very stupid.
keep telling people that i am okay okay.
but why in my heart, i feel so terrible.
so you all actually know how i feel a nod?
you all can say it so easy, forget about him.
He is not worth and blah blah blah.
BUT YOU ALL GOT CARE ABOUT HOW I FEEL?
THIS THING IS DAMN FUCKING FUCKING SAD.
LOSING SOMEONE THAT I WANT TO LIVE WITH FOREVER.
HOLDING HIS HANDS TILL I DIE.
BEING WITH HIM UNTIL I END MY LAST BREATH.
HELPING HIM WHENEVER I CAN.
I REALLY LOVE HIM.
BUT WAD CAN I DO?
I CANNOT DO ANYTHING, BUT JUST CRY ALONE WITHOUT LETTING ANYONE KNOW.
YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING SCARED THAT I WILL LOSE HIM, EVEN AS A FRIEND.
I REALLY DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO.
CAN ANOTHER HELP ME?
OR SIMPLE, KNOW MY FEELING!!!!!!!
ALL I CAN SAY IS,
NOBODY.
NOT A FUCKING PERSON.
DO YOU KNOW HOW COLD HE TREAT ME NOW?!
I JUST WANT TO TALK TO HIM,
WHY IT THAT SO FUCKING DIFFICULT?!
i feel like i am very stupid.
keep telling people that i am okay okay.
but why in my heart, i feel so terrible.
so you all actually know how i feel a nod?
you all can say it so easy, forget about him.
He is not worth and blah blah blah.
BUT YOU ALL GOT CARE ABOUT HOW I FEEL?
THIS THING IS DAMN FUCKING FUCKING SAD.
LOSING SOMEONE THAT I WANT TO LIVE WITH FOREVER.
HOLDING HIS HANDS TILL I DIE.
BEING WITH HIM UNTIL I END MY LAST BREATH.
HELPING HIM WHENEVER I CAN.
I REALLY LOVE HIM.
BUT WAD CAN I DO?
I CANNOT DO ANYTHING, BUT JUST CRY ALONE WITHOUT LETTING ANYONE KNOW.
YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING SCARED THAT I WILL LOSE HIM, EVEN AS A FRIEND.
I REALLY DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO.
CAN ANOTHER HELP ME?
OR SIMPLE, KNOW MY FEELING!!!!!!!
ALL I CAN SAY IS,
NOBODY.
NOT A FUCKING PERSON.
DO YOU KNOW HOW COLD HE TREAT ME NOW?!
I JUST WANT TO TALK TO HIM,
WHY IT THAT SO FUCKING DIFFICULT?!
what we could have been, 8:46 AM.
Saturday, April 03, 2010
Finally i am posting something in my blog le.
This few days a lot of things happen,
i dunno why.
Things are just too sudden that make me really very hard to take it.
Like losing someone that i love.
That is actually the whole sad thing that i really do not want to end de.
I just want to let the person know,
Hey, i really do not want to lose you but what can i do?
You are just leaving me in a very close environment,
i almost cannot take a breath.
Do you know how much it hurt to actually know that i had lost you.
Boy, i hope that this will have another beginning.
I will be waiting for you.
But please do not have another love so early, please.
i have prepare myself yet.
Sorry.
If you really like another one within these few days or months,
i probably will hate you bahs.
Think you will not care even i hate you or not bahs.
STELLA XD
This few days a lot of things happen,
i dunno why.
Things are just too sudden that make me really very hard to take it.
Like losing someone that i love.
That is actually the whole sad thing that i really do not want to end de.
I just want to let the person know,
Hey, i really do not want to lose you but what can i do?
You are just leaving me in a very close environment,
i almost cannot take a breath.
Do you know how much it hurt to actually know that i had lost you.
Boy, i hope that this will have another beginning.
I will be waiting for you.
But please do not have another love so early, please.
i have prepare myself yet.
Sorry.
If you really like another one within these few days or months,
i probably will hate you bahs.
Think you will not care even i hate you or not bahs.
STELLA XD
what we could have been, 7:27 AM.
